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Unemployed

September 16, 2010

I’ve been unemployed for the last couple of weeks, and as amazing as it was at first, I’m starting to lose my mind and sense of purpose.  I start training for both of my new jobs next week, but here’s a look at what I did with my uncomfortable amount of leisure time.

Watched the Bratz movie for the 2nd time

This is actually the second time I’ve seen this movie in its entirety, and surprisingly enough, I wasn’t under the influence of any drugs during either of the viewings.  My friend Albert and I watched this movie during a Saturday in our junior year of college because we figured it would be hilarious, which it was.  The movie itself is awful, but the traits and backgrounds of the characters are so overwhelmingly one-dimensional that it’s funny.  I’ll give two examples:

1) One of the Bratz is at least half-Hispanic and at one point in the movie, her and her mom dance around her room to mariachi music for no reason, as if that’s the only way Hispanic people know how to unwind.  Her mom also uses “Hola!” as an exclamation before the dance sequence.

2) One of the Bratz is defined as not as financially stable as the others, as her dad deserted (or dies, I can’t remember) her and her mom at some point  That, in and of itself, is not funny.  However, at one point in the movie, the spoiled and rich member of the Bratz gets in an argument with her and says “Well you don’t have a dad or a bank account!” Hilarious.

Watching lots and lots of Gangland

A lot of people like to watch Hoarders these days but once you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all.  Person doesn’t throw away any of their shit, person’s shit accumulates rapidly, person loses 4 loaded guns in house and defecates in the corner, person has severe separation issues blah blah blah.  I’m much more interested by Gangland.  My favorite part of the show is when the members of these gangs try to rationalize some of their ridiculous behavior to the viewer.

For instance, I was watching one episode about a motorcycle gang, in which some of the members became addicted to crystal meth and others became addicted to cocaine.  One of the members, whose face was blacked out and voice was modulated, tried to explain why he was addicted to meth and not cocaine,  and although this isn’t a direct quote, his explanation was something along these lines.

“Look, if you’re on a motorcycle for 7 or 8 hours a day, and you have cocaine that lasts a half hour and meth that lasts 9 hours…WHAT WOULD YOU DO? You’re gonna do the meth.”

What would I do? Neither of those things you psycho.  Maybe you should try getting more sleep and exercising more often; cocaine and crystal meth are not the only choices you have for staying alert on the job.  Perhaps a 5 hour energy drink.  Do you know what 2:30 in the afternoon feels like?

Being tired for absolutely no reason

I’m getting the appropriate amount of sleep and exercising, but I still needed a nap everyday of my unemployment.  It’s like my body was shutting down out of boredom of my own self; it would rather not be fully operational if it has to wander through the sadness that is my unemployed existence.  It was fun while it lasted.

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8 Comments leave one →
  1. September 16, 2010 8:57 pm

    Came across your blog today. Good to see some more dudes writing. Unemployment sucks, and being a tv junkie like myself does not help. I found myself getting caught up by half-assed procedurals like NCIS and watching reruns of Star Trek. My sleep cycle got all messed up too. Thankfully I’ve been a more productive lately, but still looking for that paycheck.

  2. September 16, 2010 9:14 pm

    When I first saw that picture of the Bratz movie, I thought that it had been made using the dolls as puppets, kind of like a squeaky, retarded Thunderbirds. I salute your courage for watching it, though, as I’m pretty sure I’d have gone off on a rage rampage about 10 minutes in.

  3. September 17, 2010 2:16 am

    I watched Gangland today about the Bloods and Crips in LA… now I know why everyone avoids wearing red or blue there, for fear of getting shot by accident. And yes, I’m guilty of watching Hoarders as well. I don’t know why but there’s something oddly fascinating about people who can’t throw anything away or shop compulsively.

  4. September 17, 2010 2:39 am

    I’m unemployed as well. I’ve been unemployed for the past 6 months. Yay for me! Also, how the hell do you stop those stupid “snapshots” from popping up? It’s REALLY annoying. K thx bai!

  5. September 17, 2010 3:19 am

    So I thought the randomly needing to nap even though you’re unemployed and do nothing all day only happened to me! Good to see i’m not the only one!

  6. September 17, 2010 5:17 am

    Haha…funny thing…when you scroll down really fast, that pic of the dog looks like a curled up naked guy. Haha.

  7. September 19, 2010 7:56 pm

    Works sucks any way. Just think about all of those awesome things you got to do. I was at work not watching Bratz or Gangland. I was sleepy and bored!

  8. September 21, 2010 9:27 am

    Doing nothing is exhausting. I once took two months off work in a desperate attempt to instantly become a successful writer (it’s been suggested I was a little naive back then) and ended up loafing around the house eating vast amounts of sandwiches, watching reality TV and sleeping.

    It was pretty depressing.

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