There’s a COMputer pun I could use here, but I won’t
Dear boys in their early teens behind me in line at 7-11,
I regret to inform you that even despite your certainty and clearly audible declaration of such, no: that is not a “shit ton of man goof” on my laptop bag.
I do admit that it may look as such, as semen is of a white coloration and the stain is white itself, but that isn’t conclusive evidence that I used my laptop bag as a “splooge target.”
Logistically speaking, why would I do that? I purchased this bag with my money to protect my laptop while on the go, and you’d think I’d do my best not to ejaculate on it. Use your head, kids.
I know as male teenagers it’s your job to assume any white stain on any surface is cum, but try to keep your assumptions to yourself. Some people don’t take kindly to people accusing them of trying to impregnate their computer accessories.
If you must know, my laptop bag is rarely in use since my battery is completely dead, meaning it has to be plugged in for it to work. The stain is from a bottle of sunscreen that leaked on it and I opted not to completely remove the stain as that would have taken time and effort, two things I’m not particularly fond of.
Sorry for the confusion and maybe next time you see a white stain, it will in fact be semen and your day will be made.
Sincerely,
Michael
That is hilarious. Teenagers are both disgusting and rude.
Fucking kids!
if I look at whitish stains and assume that they are probably ejaculatory related, does that make me a 15 year old boy?? because if so I need to rethink my entire existence.
funny post.
I don’t know. The logic kind of makes sense. One uses a computer to look at porn but it’s more expensive then, say, a Playboy. One would need to protect it from… projectiles. Maybe they assume you look at porn, quickly put the laptop cover on, and then, it’s hammer time. Not so crazy, eh?
Hilarious! Your posts always make me smile
Damn kids!
I quite often get the toothpaste on the shirt stain. Being it’s white I get the immature, “Oh did your boyfriend MISS?”
facepalming muchly was had.
I feel the same way about teenage boys and the word “nuts”. I used to constantly have issues when purchasing ice cream at a particular place because the employees were required to ask “would you like nuts?”. Every time I had a teenager boy as a cashier, he would visibly be fighting the laughter back. Luckily, I never wanted nuts, so I never had to push them over the edge, but their stifled giggles were still pretty ridiculous.